Finding a part-time job in Japan as a parent—or really in any country—can be a challenging and time-consuming undertaking. Throw in different cultural norms and a foreign language, and it can feel nearly impossible.

In America, I might show up and ask one of the staff members if they were hiring, but I wasn’t sure if it would come across as too aggressive in Japan. Thankfully, after hours of scouring the internet, painstakingly filling out resumes by hand and on the computer and making plenty of mistakes, I can share my knowledge to help others be better prepared than I was.

Why Choose A Part-Time Job?

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Many housewives and househusbands turn to アルバイト (arubaito; “part-time jobs“) for the flexible schedule and the well-known practice of maintaining spousal social insurance dependency. Not only that, but working a part-time job helps you connect more with your community and offers you a chance to improve your Japanese language skills. You might find that part-time work is more rewarding than you expected, gaining more knowledge and confidence to live in Japan.

Daycare & School Hours

It’s no surprise that being a parent comes with the unfortunate task of juggling different schedules, events, activities and finances. The moment I became a mom, I was overwhelmed with keeping up with my son’s ever-changing schedule and needs. Now that my son is starting daycare, I find myself trying to squeeze in as much work as possible during the day while also keeping our shared family calendar up to date to know who is picking up and dropping off our son.

Daycare hours in Japan vary by area and individual schools. Standard hours are usually between 7 a.m. and 6 p.m. Depending on the certification given to you by your local municipality, you might only be permitted to use shortened hours, which are from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Anything outside of the standard or shortened hours is considered extended hours, which come with an extra fee.

On paper, the schedule sounds manageable. Realistically, however, depending on your work, your commute and the location of your daycare, you might find yourself sprinting from one place to the next. If daycare ends at 6 p.m. and the typical Japanese workday also ends at 6 p.m., it becomes clear how impossible it can feel.

Applying to daycares near your home doesn’t always guarantee you will get in.

All the daycares near us were filled, from public to private to unlicensed. We were then forced to apply to ones outside of our city and prefecture. When we finally got accepted, it was a 50-minute commute from door to door. A commute like that is manageable for an adult, but for a squirmy toddler, it can be a nightmare.

What can be even more taxing are the shorter elementary school hours, with children returning home around 3 p.m. School also starts later in the morning, meaning parents might leave the house before their children do. Thankfully, most children in Japan attend elementary schools located in their neighborhoods and are easily accessible on foot. Designated volunteers in the community are stationed at some crosswalks to ensure children reach school safely, but this can make it difficult for parents to maintain a work-life balance.

Taxes & Dependency Status

Japan offers maternity leave and childcare leave to those who have ‌full-time jobs in Japan. As a foreigner who worked on English teaching contract jobs, I wasn’t one of those lucky people to get such benefits. Thankfully, while freelancing during my pregnancy and raising our son while out of work, my husband was able to claim me as a dependent. His company provided both of us with social insurance and handled our taxes every year.

In fact, many mothers in Japan are in similar situations. They often feel pressure from their managers or societal demands to be the perfect mom, which can lead them to leave their full-time jobs. On top of it all, the price of daycare can be even higher if both parents are working. To make matters worse, the daycare application process requires an overwhelming amount of paperwork that must be resubmitted, which can put a strain on an already busy work schedule.

However, working a part-time job that earns less than ¥1.3 million a year, which is approximately 20 hours of work a week at the typical Tokyo minimum wage, allows a spouse to remain a dependent. This reduces the amount a household is taxed and allows the spouse to remain on the other’s social insurance plan.

After December 1, 2025, these numbers will change slightly, but realistically, the amount‌ isn’t enough. With ever-increasing prices of goods and stagnant salaries, families are struggling and need more assistance and leniency from the government.

Applying For Part-Time Jobs

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The easiest and most straightforward way to start applying is to look online. If you don’t have any Japanese language skills or lack the confidence to interview in Japanese, there are plenty of part-time jobs that don’t require it.

GaijinPot Jobs can not only help you find places that welcome foreign staff. You can also refine your search using advanced options, such as filtering by industry and remote work availability. They also offer jobs that provide full-time or contract work, should you decide to change your work style.

If you have basic Japanese conversation skills or don’t mind navigating Japanese websites for part-time work, I recommend using these sites to get you started:

• Baitoru (バイトル)
• Townwork (タウンワーク)
• Shufu Job (しゅふJOB)

Here are some phrases you can use while searching for a job in Japanese:

After submitting your application, some jobs will contact you by phone or email to invite you in for an interview. From personal experience, a rare few will ask you to bring in a resume. Most of them had an original form they wanted me to fill out at their shop on the day of the interview.

Japanese Resumes

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For me, this was the hardest part. Resumes in Japan differ significantly from those in my home country, with far more rules and requirements. I found myself rushing to my local train station to sit in a photo booth to take a proper resume picture, which is meant to be 40mm x 30mm.

When listing your work history and education, keep in mind that Japan might have a different order than you’re used to. List your educational background first, including details about your junior high school and high school experiences. Your work history should be listed in order from your first job to the last job or the one you’re currently working.

If you are confident in your writing abilities, you can purchase resumes at the convenience store. There are two different kinds. The blue one, 履歴書用紙 (rirekisho yoshi), is typically used for changing companies or by recent graduates entering a company. The red one, パート・アルバイト用履歴書用紙(paato/arubaito you rirekisho yoshi), is more for part-time or casual work.

As a housewife or parent, you don’t need to handwrite your resume. Finding a free online template or using a free service like Canva is a great way to fill it out on your computer and save yourself the sanity of squeezing kanji into small boxes. Sites like GaijinPot Jobs allow you to upload your resume in English and Japanese, lessening the hassle of having to print one out every time you go in for an interview.

Interviewing For Part-Time Jobs

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After applying for jobs online or by phone, you should have a date set up for an interview. Since this is a part-time job, it isn’t quite as serious as applying for a corporate job. However, you should go to your interview dressed well and looking professional. Arrive 10 minutes early to complete any necessary paperwork and start the interview on a positive note.

Many of the websites and videos I watched in preparation for my interview mentioned the importance of giving a self-introduction. However, none of my interviewers asked me to introduce myself. They seemed much more interested in my reasons for choosing the job, the hours I was willing to work, whether I could work during holidays and if I wanted to remain dependent on my husband’s social insurance.

When you arrive at the store, find an employee who isn’t busy or wait patiently until you can talk to an employee. Let them know you’re there for your interview (try the Japanese below). They will likely escort you to the manager or lead you to a designated area to conduct the interview.

Here are some example questions or information you might be asked to answer during your interview, and some possible examples of how to respond.

Please give a self-introduction.

Please tell us why you chose our store.

Why did you want to start working again?

What days and times can you work?

Do you want to work within the dependent’s allowance?

When can you start working?

How long will you be working for us?

Can you work overtime?

How long is your commute and how will you get to the store?

What will you do if you’re working and your child gets sick?

Closing Thoughts

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In the end, whether you choose part-time work or full-time work, job hunting can be stressful. Do what’s best for you and your family’s situation and, of course, find a store that will be enjoyable to work at. Be honest and don’t be afraid to tell them your limits. I found that many store managers understood my situation as a mom, listened to my limits and called me in for the job.

Are you thinking about finding a part-time job or already have one? Let me know in the comments how it went or what your favorite thing about working part-time in Japan is!

November in Japan brings a unique holiday that can only be celebrated a few times in a child’s life. Shichi-Go-San (七五三), literally meaning “seven-five-three,” is an ancient holiday dedicated to celebrating children who have reached the ages of three, five and seven.

There’s nothing more exciting than these kinds of child-related celebrations for families in Japan. For me, sharing these moments with my son makes them far more memorable. When the celebration puts him at the very center, I find myself wanting to go all out with decorations, delicious food and countless photos.

The History Behind The Shichi-Go-San Ages

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While preparing for my son’s Shichi-Go-San event, I spent a considerable amount of time researching the meaning and history behind it. Unsurprisingly, and like many historical events, this holiday was once only celebrated by the emperor and upper-class nobles, including samurai. Over time, as the holiday evolved and its name and other cultural aspects changed, it became the Shichi-Go-San we know today.

In the past, there was no single holiday. There were three separate events, each one marking a particular milestone, and celebrated by both genders. They were called Kamioki, Hakamagi and Obitoki.

Nearly a thousand years ago, parents shaved their children’s heads, believing it was more sanitary and would prevent the children from getting sick. After turning three years old, they would hold Kamioki, a hair growth ritual. From that day onwards, the child would grow out their hair and begin their fresh start into childhood.

Children who had reached the age of five would participate in the Hakamagi ceremony. They would don their first hakama as the second milestone in childhood. This ceremony was initially open to both genders, but during the Edo period, it became a ceremony for boys only.

Similarly, Obitoki was originally a ceremony held for both boys and girls. When children reached the age of seven, they would begin using an obi to fasten their kimono in place, symbolizing their last few steps towards adulthood. This tradition also underwent a change a few hundred years ago, evolving into a ceremony for girls.

In the past, children were susceptible to various diseases, and it’s no wonder these milestones were considered significant reasons to celebrate. Even in the modern era, where children have a higher chance of survival, I’m always delighted to find an excuse to dress up and spend memorable moments with my family.

1,000-Year Candy & Other Treats

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Besides getting to celebrate with my son, eating delicious food is by far one of the best things about holidays. With Shichi-Go-San comes a lot of fun sweets, but the most famous is by far chitose-ame (one-thousand-year-old candy) made from rice and barley.

Don’t worry, the candy itself isn’t actually a thousand years old. Instead, the long length of the candy is meant to symbolize a long and healthy life for the child. Much like the custom of consuming soba noodles on New Year’s, this belief also centers on the wish for a long and healthy life.

The candy often comes in a bag with other symbols of a long life, such as cranes and turtles. It has become so popular that your local supermarket might sell it. I actually passed by this candy many times without ever realizing its importance, as it doesn’t look all too spectacular.

© Photo by iStock: StudioYummy

Besides chitose-ame, you can find desserts from cake shops to traditional wagashi being sold with various symbols on them. There are entire catalogs devoted to Shichi-Go-San gifts. These gifts can be given to grandparents or close family and friends as a way to express gratitude for their support. You might also be on the receiving end of gifts, congratulating you for raising a healthy child.

Some families make reservations at expensive restaurants, while others prefer a more tight-knit gathering at home. If you’re bringing your three-year-old, you might feel some stress eating out. My husband’s family often hosts gatherings in their home, preferring to cook up healthy dishes and share their favorite recipes with close friends. I recommend choosing what feels most comfortable for your family.

Prayers & Blessings

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Usually celebrated on or around November 15, families often visit shrines to express gratitude and receive blessings for the coming year. However, as shrines and daily life can get busy, some families visit the shrine in mid-October or towards the end of November.

Every shrine has its own unique approach to Shichi-Go-San, so please check with your local shrine before visiting.

Recommended Shrines in Tokyo

Hie Shrine

One of the most popular and well-known shrines offering prayers from October is Hie Shrine in Chiyoda City, Tokyo. It’s centrally located and makes for a beautiful place to take professional pictures. Their website even offers plans and rentals for those who wish to use their services.

• Address: 2-10-5 Nagatachō, Chiyoda City, Tokyo (Google Map Link)
• Closest Stations: Kokkai-gijidomae Station (Tokyo Metro Marunouchi Line and Chiyoda Line), Tameike-sanno Station (Tokyo Metro Ginza Line and Namboku Line)
• Prayer Fee: ¥10,000 
• Reception Hours: 9 a.m.-4 p.m. *No reservations required

Kanda Myojin

Also in central Tokyo, and easily accessible, is Kanda Myojin. Famous for the origin of chitose-ame, Kanda Myojin is another popular destination for families looking to celebrate their little ones. If you want to grab chitose-ame from the original shop that began selling it, stop by Amano-ya right outside the shrine’s main gate. They also sell many other delicious desserts, as well as their famous amazake.

• Address: 2-16-2 Sotokanda, Chiyoda-ku, Tokyo (Google Map Link)
• Closest Stations: Suehirocho Station (Ginza Line); Shin-Ochanomizu Station (Chiyoda Line); Ochanomizu Station (Marunouchi Line and Chuo-Sobu Line)
• Prayer Fee: ¥10,000 
• Reception Hours: 9 a.m. to 3:45 p.m. *No reservations required

Local Shrines

For a more pleasant experience for everyone, I suggest smaller local shrines, especially when dealing with little ones who can become easily exhausted. Since this day is meant to be a happy and positive one for parents and children alike, plan ahead by visiting early.

As for myself and my family, I adore my husband’s neighborhood shrine. As someone who isn’t big on waiting in long lines, I prefer this local one by far! My son is still young and also doesn’t have much patience for waiting. It isn’t as massive as many of the famous shrines scattered around Tokyo, but it feels more meaningful to us.

Capturing Memorable Moments

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There are numerous, perhaps thousands, of photo studios throughout Tokyo advertising for Shichi-Go-San. October and November are the peak seasons, which can extend into September and December as parents try to save money or compete for a reservation spot.

Recommended 7-5-3 Photo Studios in Tokyo/Japan

Studio250 (Shinjuku)

• Prices starting at ¥18,700
• The background is simple but, for a fee, can be changed

Seijo Kosodeya (Setagaya)

• Various price plans for the different age groups
• Costume and dressing are included in the fee

Studio Alice (Various Locations)

• An all-inclusive weekday studio photoshoot starting from ¥7,530
• They will be offering Shichi-Go-San shoots until the end of the year

Studio Origami (Various Locations)

• Weekday plan: From ¥15,900; Weekend/holiday plan: From ¥22,900
• One costume is free with the photo shoot

LifeStudio (Various Locations)

• Prices starting at ¥33,000
• Outfits for children can be rented out for free (You can also bring in your own costumes to wear during the photo shoot)

Freelance Photographers on Fotowa (Various Locations)

• Choose the pricing plan that fits you
• Work directly with local photographers
• Some photographers speak English and are LGBTQ supportive

Clothing Options

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The kimono and haori are still very popular choices for Shichi-Go-San. However, these days, many families opt for Western-style formal suits and dresses on the special day. If you’re struggling to make a choice, it’s perfectly acceptable to choose both outfits and change in between photos and events. I was lucky that my parents sent us a set of suits as a Christmas gift that still fit my son the following year.

If you’re interested in renting, Madoi is one of the rental places in Tokyo where you can pay for the garments and even return them to the store by mail. It can cost around ¥16,000, which to me is still quite pricey. They charge separate fees for dressing and makeup. I’m lucky since my son doesn’t need anything additional, but for parents who want their daughter’s hair done, the cost begins to add up.

Online stores like Rakuten or Amazon are an option for parents who want to keep the clothes as memorabilia. Spending over ¥10,000 on an outfit that can only be worn once isn’t always ideal, especially given the current state of the economy. If you’re crafty and good with a needle, you might even be able to alter the fabric to something your child can wear every day.

Shichi-Go-San Tips & Tricks

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Shichi-Go-San is an event that only happens once or twice in a person’s life. Besides Seiji-no-Hi, a coming-of-age event, you may not get another opportunity to celebrate these meaningful milestones.

With that in mind, there are a few ways to save money:

• Make your photo shoot reservations early between January and August, the off-season
• Weekends and holidays often cost more than normal weekdays
• Getting photographs done in the studio can be cheaper than a location photo shoot
• Outfits can be found online, so it might save you more to buy rather than rent
• Buy the basic digital data now and make prints later when you want them
• Some smaller local shrines offer prayers for a cheaper price
• Choose a photographer or studio that allows cancellations
• Formal clothes and little ones don’t mix well, so prepare treats, stickers, whatever your kiddo will love

Do what’s best for you, your family and your budget. In the end, the important point is taking time to recognize happy milestones your child is going through and celebrating them with a smile.

Has your child dressed up for Shichi-Go-San before? Share your family’s experience with us!

For me, baking isn’t just a hobby, but a way to destress after a hectic work week. My delight in making a fresh batch of brownies, however, was quickly replaced with dread. I found myself squatting in the supermarket aisle, hunched over different bags of flour. I spent an ungodly amount of time translating and researching to determine which baking ingredients in Japan were the right ones to make the dessert I wanted to make.

To make the process easier for you, I will go through and break down the different types of baking ingredients Japan offers, as well as how they might differ from those in your home country.

Types Of Flour in Japan

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The center of most baking recipes: komugiko (小麦粉; flour). Directly translating the kanji can be confusing for some. Japanese flour is typically categorized by its protein/gluten content rather than its intended purpose.

薄力粉 (hakurikiko; “weak flour”)

Hakurikiko is a low-protein flour that is closest to cake flour. It’s lower in gluten, which makes a lighter, fluffier texture best used for recipes such as cakes, cookies and pancakes.

強力粉 (kyourikiko; “strong flour”) 

High in protein, kyourikiko is also known as bread flour. Best for denser breads like pizza dough, and anything that needs strong gluten development.

中力粉 (chuurikiko; “medium flour”) 

Chuurikiko is a medium-protein flour similar to all-purpose flour. Most recipes written in English typically use all-purpose flour due to its versatility. It’s perfect for everything from lighter cakes to denser basque cheesecakes.

From personal experience, I found this flour harder to find in supermarkets. If this happens, you can experiment by mixing the weaker flour with the stronger flour.

自己調達小麦粉 (jikochotatsu komugiko; “self-raising flour”)

This is a delight for most bakers because it requires far less measuring of different ingredients. It makes great desserts, such as cupcakes and brownies. It’s not as easy to find in Japan as the other flours. An imported goods shop in your neighborhood might sell it.

Types Of Sugar in Japan

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When it comes to baked goods, satou (砂糖; sugar) is one of the most crucial ingredients. Nearly every recipe calls for some type of sweetener to either activate the yeast in bread or add flavor to pastries.

上白糖 (jouhakutou; “white sugar”)

Used almost exclusively in Japan, jouhakutou is a white sugar that has bisco, a type of sugar liquid, added to it during the manufacturing process. This increases the moisture content of the sugar, making it sweeter and more enjoyable. This can, however, alter your recipes ever so slightly due to this process.

グラニュー糖 (guranyutou; “granulated sugar”)

This is likely the type of sugar you are familiar with and use in your home country. It may be harder to find, depending on your supermarket or neighborhood. If you’re in a pinch, I recommend trying jouhakutou in your recipe by adjusting the amount to suit your taste buds.

三温糖 (sanontou; “light brown sugar”)

Light brown sugar has a very subtle molasses flavor, one that many bakers are familiar with. If your recipe calls for brown sugar, this is the one that will better fit the flavor profile you’re looking for.

黒糖 (kokutou; “dark brown sugar”)

In Japan, dark brown sugar is usually made from the sugarcane grown in Okinawa or Kagoshima. It has a strong, rich flavor that is distinctly Japanese. Because of its refining process, it’s considered healthier than other sugars.

Since Japanese dark brown sugar lacks molasses, as found elsewhere, I recommend tasting it before using it in any baked goods.

ラカント(rakanto; “monk fruit sweetener”)

Gaining popularity for its health benefits and ease of use, Lakanto can serve as a suitable substitute for regular sugar. It can be pretty pricey, but for those with diabetes or concerned about calories, this is the perfect addition to your baking arsenal.

粉砂糖 (kona zatō; “powdered sugar“)

Whether you need it for making a frosting or adding air to a delicious cheese tart, this is the sugar you’re looking for. It’s not always easy to find in the supermarket and might require a trip to an imported goods shop.

Types Of Dairies in Japan

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無塩バター (musen bataa; “unsalted butter”)

有塩バター (yuuen bataa; “salted butter”)

マーガリン (maagarin; “margarine”)

Be aware that butter-flavored or butter margarines can sometimes look misleading with バター labels, but are obviously not the real thing if what you’re looking for is real butter. Real butter will typically have only two ingredients: 生乳 (seinyu; raw milk) and salt (if you prefer salted butter).

生クリーム (nama kuriimu; “fresh cream”)

If you’re planning to make whipped cream or cheesecake, I recommend looking for nama kuriimu with a fat content of around 35-47%. To ensure it’s made from real milk, check the ingredients by looking for クリーム (cream), 牛乳 (gyuunyuu; milk) or seinyu.

Pre-made ホイップ (hoippu; whip or whipped cream) is convenient for when you’re in a hurry, but it contains a variety of other ingredients, including vegetable oils and emulsifiers that you might not be interested in.

Japanese Cheat Sheet For Other Baking Essentials

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Ingredients

Equipment/Tools

Where To Buy Baking Ingredients & Equipment in Japan

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• Tomizawa Shoten (Nationwide): One of Japan’s most famous baking and bread-making supply chains that offers thousands of ingredients (flour and nuts to dried fruit, chocolate and baking molds).
• 212 Kitchen Store (Nationwide): A kitchen-goods retail chain that carries a wide range of cooking and baking tools.
• Decora-Shop (Online): A confectionery tool store with adorable cookie cutters and imported baking tools.
• Cotta (Online): A major supplier of baking and bread-making ingredients, as well as wrapping and packaging materials.
• Il Pleut Sur La Seine (Online): An online shop offering premium confectionery ingredients and high-quality imported items.

3 Must Visit Baking Supply Shops in Kappabashi, Tokyo

Kappabashi in Asakusa is “Tokyo’s Kitchen Town”. It’s a dream destination for anyone who loves baking or cooking. Here are three must visit shops to check out while you stroll:

1. Majimaya Kashi Doguten: A long-established shop with over 6,000 baking tools like high-quality molds, cookie cutters or traditional Japanese baking utensils.
2. Asai Shoten: A favorite among both professionals and home bakers, this shop specializes in bread-making and Western-style baking tools like durable aluminum bakeware, loaf pans and cake rings.
3. Kama-Asa Shoten: Although best known for its high-quality kitchen knives and cast-iron cookware, this shop also carries a selection of premium baking utensils and temperature control tools.

Where To Find Imported Goods in Japan

If you need specialty items like self-raising flour, baking soda or food coloring, check:

• Kaldi Coffee Farm
• Costco (Membership required)
• Online (Rakuten, Amazon Japan, iHerb)
• Daiso: Surprisingly, some Daiso stores sell baking soda. However, double-check that the one you’re buying is food-grade baking soda to ensure safety.

Adapting Recipes To Fit Japanese Life

For many recipes, you might find yourself converting cups to milliliters or grams, keeping in mind that every country considers a ‘cup’ to be a different size. In Japan, one standard cup is equivalent to 200 milliliters. I highly recommend buying a scale as soon as possible to help weigh ingredients more easily in grams.

The other major caveat associated with baking in Japan is the limited availability of ovens. Should you decide to buy one, you’ll quickly realize that ovens in Japan are relatively small and the temperature isn’t quite as high as those in other countries.

For the first three years of living in Japan, I did most of my baking experiments with microwave and toaster oven recipes. I have even baked bread on my stovetop using a pot and lid!

If you have a favorite recipe or advice on baking without an oven or the right ingredients in Japan, please share it in the comments below to help fellow baking enthusiasts!

For many mothers in Japan, the journey into motherhood brings joy, sleepless nights and an unexpected sense of loneliness. While parenting is a universally challenging experience, Japanese social norms, cultural expectations and the structure of community life can make it particularly difficult for moms to form lasting friendships.

These past two years were full of change for me as I transitioned into motherhood and moved to a new prefecture. With this big change came job loss, daycare-waiting-list limbo, and worst of all, loneliness. I was struggling to cope with the monumental task of making new friends in a new city.

But maybe luck took pity on me because I somehow managed to make one friend. She’s a Japanese mother of two, and it was beyond refreshing to hear her honesty about the problems women face as mothers in Japan. She noted that finding long-term mama-tomo (mom friends) is equally difficult for Japanese mothers.

The Isolation Begins Early

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For many new mothers, isolation starts during pregnancy or immediately after birth. Maternity leave can cause resentment in the workplace, especially if the mother’s coworkers take on her workload. If the search for daycare extends beyond expectations, this can increase tensions in the office. Many working moms abandon stable careers for part-time jobs for this reason.

In addition, cultural attitudes about burdening others often prevent women from reaching out. The Japanese value of enryo (restraint or modesty) means mothers may hesitate to invite others over or ask for help—even if they’re struggling. For non-Japanese mothers, it can be even harder if their extended family is out of the country. They have to rely on friends or in-laws, which might make some people uncomfortable.

The “Perfect Mother” Pressure

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Before getting pregnant, I attended many lunches with friends who had children. I could see the burden they carried to prove they were the perfect mothers—organized, nurturing, modest and wholly devoted to motherhood. This can be one of the main reasons many mothers might put up walls to avoid criticism.

For working mothers, it can be even harder. There’s little time or energy left for socializing. And since many mama-tomo groups revolve around school activities scheduled during the day, working moms often feel left out. Even when opportunities arise, they might experience guilt for their lack of participation in their child’s school life. This can further alienate them from potential friendships.

Opportunities For Connection

© Photo by Aspen Kumagai

As a first-time mom and a foreigner, attending events or classes was intimidating. The first time I went to a kodomokan (children’s hall), I begged my husband to go with me. The idea of showing up at an unfamiliar place with my four-month-old in tow terrified me. By sharing my experience, I hope to ease your fears about visiting Japan’s children’s centers.

The kodomokan was large, for all ages, and had a small entrance fee of ¥200. There were no forms to sign or reservations necessary. There was a designated baby area for children from zero months to two years of age. A diaper changing station with hot water was a few steps away, should I need anything at all. In fact, I didn’t talk to the staff the entire time I was there.

As for my local jidoukan (children’s center)‌, I ended up filling out a form on my second visit. The staff wanted to make my son a cute name tag to wear during his visits. They also invited us to join the upcoming club, Paruniko Kurabu, which was a designated club for my son’s age. Different clubs are available for various age groups, and they offer unique, fun activities monthly.

Among the many events they hold, my local jidoukan also has a toy library where children can rent a toy for a month. The experienced staff happily distract or guide your child during events, giving moms a much-needed break. Overall, it’s a place meant to help children blow off steam and moms to relax.

A Path Forward

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After talking with many moms, both Japanese and non-Japanese, I’ve come to realize that we’re all struggling to find a solid group of friends. Some of these friendships might be surface-level, centering on playdates, and amount to nothing more. Despite these challenges, many moms in Japan do eventually find their people—it just takes time, intention and resilience.

Some strategies that help include:

• Joining local parenting groups or classes and making a habit of attending regularly.
• Volunteering at school or community events, even in small ways. If you’re a working mom, this can be slightly embarrassing, but even the most minor effort counts. Plus, other working moms will find comfort in knowing they’re not alone.
• Taking the initiative to invite other moms for coffee or playdates, despite the fear of rejection.
• Being open and a little vulnerable can help others feel safe to do the same.
• Connecting online, where many moms find supportive spaces to vent, share and meet others.

Perhaps most importantly, please know that if you feel lonely, you’re far from alone. Nearly every mother I spoke to mentioned the struggle to make friends. They even admitted that the friendships were sometimes shallow or limited. These connections may come slowly, but for many moms, those hard-won friendships become a lifeline on the long, beautiful and often lonely journey of parenting.

If you’ve found your mama-tomo or have tips on making connections with other moms, then leave a comment down below. Let us know what worked for you or where you met them so that other moms can do the same and make some friends in Japan.